I feel as if a lot is being required of me right now. Though my list is ever long, the requirements I’m talking about are not my scribbled notes beside me as I type. They are requirements whispered directly into my heart—trust, have faith.
Trust is one thing. It’s based on history, and history is something I can grasp. Trust is earned. I trust because I’ve experienced cause to trust. The key to increasing trust is simply remembering—remembering God’s faithfulness, how He has moved in my life already, how I can trace His presence and movement to draw me to Himself. But, I’m being called to something else beyond trust. I am not called to only trust that He will continue to move and draw me to Himself and grow me and bless me as He has. I am called to have faith which is a whole different thing.
Faith isn’t based on history, though I believe God uses that history to help move me to have faith. It’s the conviction of things not yet seen. Faith is an assurance that isn’t earned as trust is earned. It’s not about remembering as much as it is about hope.
As we are facing big things, I trust Him. I trust that He is working in us and through us; I can look back and see that. I trust that He will equip us for that which He is calling us to; I can look back and see that He’s done that before. I trust that He will provide for us and that any temporal things we cannot have because of where He’s brought us will be simply temporal and nothing more; He’s done it before.
And, yet…
He’s taking us down a path we’ve never been before. And, I must have faith in Him in an entirely new way. If my independent spirit finds it hard to trust, you better believe that having faith is utterly unsettling and causes this heart to physically ache at times.
The best sermons are the ones we preach to ourselves. So, I’m doing a lot of preaching lately, all about God’s character and how He called His people to trust and have faith from the beginning of time and what happened when they did and what happened when they did not. If I can’t remember to see it in my own life, I’ll going to remember what He’s done in others’ lives when they stepped out to serve.
A year from now, months from now, maybe days from now, we will be in a different place, hopefully further along on that path He’s taking us. When I get there, I pray my trust is greater as we experience His faithfulness in our lives and that the need for increased faith is greater too. After all, we are arguably always taking a path we’ve never taken before, being called to trust that He’s constant and to have faith that He’s going before us.
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him! How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er;
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus! Oh, for grace to trust Him more!