My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

Archives for April 2010

Change


  • Change in seasons while we were away. In only 16 days, our yard and our neighborhood was transformed. Everything is green and blooming. So nice to come home from China where the bulk of our trip was in dusty, hazy, grey weather to see this. Spring is definitely here. 
  • Change from a serious, stoic baby to a smiling, active one. 
  • Change from a mom who could just let her kids freely play to one that has to babyproof things and remember that little hands are into things. I’ve been out of the baby stage for a while now. This change, even though I have so wanted it for years, is going to take some getting used to.
  • Change for the previous baby of the house. For 4 years, he’s been the baby, and he’s enjoyed that role. Lydia has turned all of our world’s upside down, but Drew may be having the hardest time adjusting. He’s been clingy to Mark and me and using a lot of baby talk. On Sunday, I suggested that he wear his Chinese vest to visit the older kids’ schools at the end of the week as they do a presentation about China. He loved wearing this vest for Chinese New Year, begged me to wear it in fact. But, at my suggestion Sunday, he informed us that he didn’t like the vest and then said, “I don’t like Chinese people.” We just let him be and didn’t make a big deal about it. I guess it’s just his stress coming out because he’s certainly not showing it towards Lydia. He is all over her, loving her. Monday morning, he woke up early to play with her and told me, “I just want to kiss Lydia all day long,” and he basically did (see picture below for proof of one of the hundreds of kisses he’s planted on this girlie).

  • Change in family makeup. Lydia may have had 30+ babies sleeping in the same room with her at the orphanage. But, she did not know what it was like to have 2 brothers and a sister. Not only has she had to get used to Mark and me, now she’s getting used to Evan, Ashlyn, and Drew. She seems to really like their attention though and is always reaching for their fingers to help her toddle around. They really are wonderful with her.
  • Change in daily life. It hit me today, my first day with the kids back to school and Mark back to work, that daily life is going to be full of a lot of phone calls, appointments, evaluations, lab work, etc. for a while. Perhaps it was the fact that I was scooping poop into vials today that made that abundantly clear. Now, that’s love. I personally enjoyed the instructions that came with the poop collection kit. Can you read what it says in the picture? Do people actually try to poop into this little vial? There is always fine print for a reason, right? Gross. 

  • Change in sleep. No pictures for this one since my dark circles under my eyes are unsightly. Lydia has adapted well to the time change. Friday night, she slept from about 2am-5am, not good. Saturday night, she slept from 9pm-12am (insert our good friend Benadryl here. I didn’t want to use it, honestly. But, when she woke up at midnight…I just couldn’t do it) and then 12am-6am. Sunday night, 10pm-7am. Monday night, 8pm-5:30am. Not bad. Mark and I, on the other hand, are still a wreck. We thought we were doing pretty good. Then, last night, we crashed by 8:30 and were both wide awake at 2:30am. Though I’m happy that we’re all caught up on the LOST episodes we missed while in China, I would have really liked a little more sleep. And, I’m not looking forward to the way I’m going to feel come dinner time. 

Lots and lots of change for everyone. It’s all quite an adventure, that’s for sure. I’m working on a post of travel hints, packing suggestions, etc. I feel like I’ve gotta get all my ideas out in words or I’ll just forget it all since I’m nearly forgetting my name lately. So, those of you who are preparing to travel, watch for the post. Hopefully, it will help one of you at least…or maybe it will just enlighten those of you who don’t know me about how anal retentive I can be.

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Home Sweet Home

Our first family picture as a family of 6

We made it! It was a brutal day(s) of travel–left the White Swan at 7:30AM and arrived at home at about 11:00PM…about 28 hours of travel door to door. Lydia was great on the first flight from Guangzhou to Beijing. And, she really did quite well on the flight from Beijing to Newark. Having the bulkhead seat with the bassinet was a HUGE blessing (as well as the fact that Mark got the seat with me). Anyone who is traveling with a child under 2 NEEDS to get those seats. Lydia slept on and off as did we. But, she cried very little. But, when we were only 15 minutes from landing (after I had changed her into a cute coming home outfit, mind you), she got airsick and threw up multiple times all over herself and us and our diaper bag. Nice. So, she was not too happy and neither were we (or the surrounding passengers). As soon as we got off, we called my mom to tell her we had landed (there was a whole entourage waiting for us). She then informed us that Ashlyn was sick and had thrown up twice at the airport. Nice. Welcome home to us, huh? She was a real trooper though and still was very happy to see us and Lydia and sat nicely while we grabbed a quick bite of dinner with the whole fam. It was great to be reunited with the kiddos–brought tears to both of our eyes. They are just in love with Lydia. Evan said last night, “If I were doing this, I’d pick her too.” Drew said, “I wouldn’t. I’d want a boy.” He’s a kick. He loves his baby sister though. She wasn’t ready to go to bed until after 2AM and then was awake again by 5AM (this was her “afternoon nap”….ugh). Even though the other three went to bed super late, they were up between 6:30 and 7 ready to give her tours of the house and show her every toy she could play with. Poor thing is probably way over stimulated. She did really well today though and was asleep tonight by 8PM. If she sleeps through the night, I may sing the Hallelujah chorus tomorrow morning.

Poor pitiful Ashlyn waiting for us to arrive.
While everyone else wandered around to keep busy during the long wait, Evan didn’t leave his spot, anxiously waiting to see us for the first time in 16 days with Lydia in our arms. 

Their first view of us (above). While Ashlyn and Drew ran to meet us, Evan just started hollering and doing a jig. Bohdan caught the excitement and joined in.

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Next stop Phoenixville

Well, not really. But, in our mind it is. 
I’m taking a pause in the packing to compose one last blog post while on Chinese soil! In less than 12 hours, we will leave our oasis of the White Swan hotel and head off with the other Living Hope families for the airport. We will fly into Beijing with China Air, wait a couple hours and then board our Continental flight for Newark! Door to door, we will be traveling for about 24 hours….with a baby. Pray for us! This is the day I have really been anxious about for literally years. Since we started this adoption process, both Mark and I would talk about this long trip home with a toddler and just stop talking about it because we would break a sweat. 
Only 4 weeks ago, we got the news that China had granted us travel approval. Now, we have our daughter, and we are headed home. What a life-changing experience we have had. The wait is over, the journey to find her and meet her is over, all the paperwork is over, incessant calls to Sarah at Living Hope are over (well, officially they are. But, don’t worry, Sarah, I’m not going to let you off that easy). Now, the rest our journey begins. I can’t wait for Evan, Ash, and Drew to meet her. I can’t wait for the whole family to meet her. I can’t wait to see Lydia toddling around our house and sleeping in her crib.
God’s hands have been on this child from the first moments of her life, no doubt. He protected her and held her in His arms when she was held in no other arms. He set her apart for us and redeemed a sad thing into the most beautiful picture of His love for us. He prepared us and worked in us to open our hearts to her. He led us as we stepped out in faith to say yes to her when the doctors gave us much to be concerned about. We cannot leave this place without remembering what He has done–He has called, protected, prepared, provided, guided, redeemed, and sanctified us in all. We will not forget His work. The bag of stones given to us by her orphanage from the grounds of the orphanage will serve as our ebenezer, may they remind her of His goodness as well when she is grown. 
I know I will cry as we leave this place. How do you not when they have just given us the gift of a daughter? And, we have such sweet memories from the last 16 days and have built relationships that will last a lifetime. The Vance family, the Corbeil family, the Woods family, and the Bisignano family are now dear friends. I so look forward to planning times together again and seeing how all their children grow. Each one of their children is amazing, all with their own stories of God’s hands on them. I’ve already proposed an arranged marriage perhaps for Lydia and Jake Woods. 
Dear Evan, Ashlyn, and Drew–boy, are we excited to see you guys! Don’t be surprised if I’m crying when I see you. You know how I sometimes cry when I’m really super happy. We’ll have been on that plane for a very long time. Lydia may be fussy and tired. And, she might be a little scared of all the new faces. She’s used to hearing Chinese everywhere; this is going to be a big change for her! But, I know she will love you quickly as you love her. For the last time from China, we love you!

I’m including some random pictures here for the last post–a picture of cutie patootie Jake. He’s a handful now, but he’s the cutest little guy ever. 
 
 
Here’s salesman Jack and me–we became friends over the week. He’s looking for an American girlfriend if anyone knows anyone interested. :) 
 
 
Also included a picture of us in front of the Pleasant Goat characters. This cartoon is the most popular one in China. These characters are everywhere. I tried to get a DVD of the cartoon in English, but they didn’t have any.
 
 
And, last, there’s a picture of Mark and Lydi enjoying the birds in the hotel lobby. 
 
 
A very special thank you to Ashley for posting all my blog entries and dealing with all those pictures I emailed to her to put on there. She’s been a real trooper–especially as she is preparing for her own trip to China! Next blog post will be posted by me from Phoenixville, PA! 

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we’re all sworn in

The only official item of business for us today was our oath at the U.S. Consulate. We weren’t sure what to expect with this. The consulate used to be in the building directly next to our hotel, until 2005, which made things very convenient for adoptive families. Now, it’s a 35 minute drive away. Using 2 charter buses, 42 Chinese children and all their families made the trek to the consulate building. I am not sure quite what I was picturing. I think I was picturing something more like a fancy embassy, but, it’s just rented space in an office building. So, all of us went up escalator after escalator to the 5th floor, showed our passports, and went through security to get to this large room for the oath. Everyone took a seat and waited to hear their child’s Chinese name called on the loud speaker. At that time, we went forward to one of 5 different windows and showed our passports again and verified that we were who we said we were and Chen Mei Yue was who we said she was. Then, we waited for each family to complete this step. When everyone was finished, a young American woman got up and spoke for a few minutes about the visa process and what their office does. She also told us that last year, there were 3.000 Chinese adoption visas given to children; and, for the first time, there were more special needs adoptions than healthy adoptions (57% to 43%). She went over some business items including some paperwork issues and how our children would become American citizens as soon as we pass through immigration at our prospective airports in the states. Right now, our children are still Chinese citizens, holding Chinese passports and are recognized only by their Chinese names. But, as soon as they stamp her passport in Newark, NJ on Friday evening, she will be an American citizen. Then, all 42 sets of parents stood up and raised their right hands and repeated the words of the young woman, promising that all the information we had provided to the government regarding this adoption was true to the best of our knowledge. She then congratulated us; some people clapped and hugged. And, that was it. Not a whole lot of pomp and circumstance really, but it’s nice to know that all the paperwork is done. All that is left is picking up her visa tomorrow and then we are headed home. 
 
 
We have departure on the brain; we started to pack up our suitcases some tonight. I’m trying to not think about the fact that we are facing that extremely long flight again now with baby in tow. And, at this point, Mark’s and my seats are not together. I’m so hoping that when my mom calls to confirm our flights for us, she can sweet talk them into putting Mark next to me in the bulkhead seats. Please, Continental, please!
We took our red couch pictures today as well. They didn’t turn out so great–getting a good picture of 4 children at the same time and even more people in the group shot is practically miraculous. I still would like to try again if possible. I really wanted to get the full red couch–don’t know how these pictures became tradition for adoptive families but it has been for years. Everybody gets their picture taken on one of the red couches in the lobby of the White Swan hotel. The other pictures were taken in the lobby as well. The workmen here were feeding the koi fish and then trying to scoop up one of the big mamas. Someone in our travel group saw them walk away with one in a bucket yesterday. I guess they cook these as well as admire them???? 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Dear Evan, Ashlyn, and Drew – as I am writing this, it’s Wednesday morning at home and Ashlyn and Evan just went to school. You’ll have one more full day of school and then the next day, we’ll be coming home. Are you excited to see us and meet Lydia? Enjoy your last two nights with Grammy, and don’t fuss about doing your homework, okay? We love you and think of you so so much.

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