• Home
  • Blog
  • The Sparrow Fund
    • Together Called
    • We Are Grafted In blog
    • Speaking
  • Jiayin
  • Contact

My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

  • Home
  • Blog
  • The Sparrow Fund
    • Together Called
    • We Are Grafted In blog
    • Speaking
  • Jiayin
  • Contact

Extravagance {Disney Style}

2.1.16

We received the news about a year ago. 2016 was going to be the year of something grand. Nanma and Granddaddy were splurging big time in the form of a family adventure for all 17 of us.

A full year of planning. A full year of anticipation. A full year of excitement building. This past week, leaving just before our city was pummeled with snow, we left real life and gathered with family for some serious memory making.

Disney faves - 4
 

It was all for the kids…totally all for the kids. Really. 

Disney faves - 3
Disney faves - 2

All 17 of us singing the Mickey Mouse theme song together before boarding the first bus to the park. All the various daily costumery. The Mickey shaped waffles and ice creams. Standing in line to take pictures with characters who only use sign language. Seeing people’s faces when they asked how many were in our party. Trading pins every 5 minutes to build our own and everyone else’s varied collections. Singing “Let it Go” along with Elsa at the top of our lungs. Totally all for the 9 kids.

Disney faves - 1Disney faves - 9

Disney faves - 12Disney faves - 14

Memories were made. The kids had the time of their lives. And, yeah…I’ll admit it…so did we. It was an extravagant, lavish gift for our family from parents who know that all trips can’t be work, that families need to make the costly investment to go together and simply enjoy each other without burdens. That’s just what we did last week. We looked out on the masses together and said wow, and we held on to each other and smiled until our cheeks hurt, and we let go of all responsibility except the responsibility of relationships with each other and we connected and enjoyed a great example of God’s extravagant love for us that is not deserved and isn’t earned.

Disney crowd

Disney faves - 6Disney faves - 13

We came home to a driveway still covered in at least a foot and a half of snow. Our children have oodles of schoolwork their teachers are insisting they catch up on. And, Mark’s and my desks are piled up with things to do. Real life is still here. But, we’re loving the fact that we have about a dozen Mickey shaped rice krispie treats that we’re going to have for dessert tonight (maybe dinner?) as we recount again our favorite moments together over the past week and dream about our next trip…whenever that may be. Nanma and Granddaddy, we’re game whenever you want to take us again. It’s all for the kids, really, but we’re game.

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: why can't they just stay little forever

“Be irrational today!”

1.14.16

You may not realize it, but today is a big day. It’s January 14th, a somewhat normal Thursday. Doesn’t seem much like a big day. But, today means that we’re officially 2 weeks into the new year which means that workout centers will start to clear out starting today and donut shops start picking up business again. Resolutions die today, at least according to popular research.

For some reason, many of us still feel compelled to make one—I’m going to read more this year, workout three times a week, drink less coffee, organize my life. We put our foot down and resolutely say, “This no more” or “This going forward.” But, only 2 weeks later, we start to drop the ball on whatever we promised as we watched the ball drop on New Year’s Eve. I’ve found myself there before though it usually took me a few more weeks to notice my feebleness, shrug my shoulders, and say “nevermind.” This year, I had none of that—not because I’ve got resolution superpowers. I just didn’t make any conscious resolutions at all.

But, I read something this week (note to self: be careful what I read because I will be challenged and compelled to respond which means lots of discomfort and unrest which seems to be my modus operandi as of late). It was from the well known psychologist Urie Bronfenbrenner famous for getting the Head Start program going in 1965 and for demonstrating the importance of connection.

In order to develop normally, a child requires progressively more complex joint activity with one or more adults who have an irrational emotional relationship with the child. Somebody’s got to be crazy about that kid. That’s number one. First, last, and always.

kids in a rowI read it and then I read it again. I want to love my kids like that.

It makes sense. We all need that. We long to be loved with a crazy kind of love, a love that defies reason, a love that doesn’t make sense, a love that says that nothing you do could make you loved any less or any more. That’s the kind of mom I want to be, for those children born to me and the one who was born to another. I want to be an irrational mom.

But, I’m so much more comfortable in the rational world. I like A + B = C. I like the comfort of predictability. Reason is my friend. And, yet. I know I need to let that go. Relationships require me to let that go. The hearts of my children require me to let that go. Reasonable love simply does not suffice. When he pushes me away and slams his door, I still love. When she yells and screams and refuses to listen, I still love. When he won’t put his shoes on or forgets his folder again, I still love. When she sulks and avoids eye contact, I still love. It’s not easy. I don’t know what that looks like all the time. It stretches me, demands practice, is easier with the help of a partner, and keeps me very aware of my own frailty. It’s where I need to be.

I bailed on a resolution this year. I probably was too busy being rational to make one. But, I’ve got a new word now that I’m shooting for as we head into the remaining 50 weeks of 2016—irrationality. Yeah, how’s that for my one word? Everyone else is picking words like strong, commitment, freedom, purpose, intentional. I may be the only one wanting someone to make me some hand drawn word art to hang by my desk that says “Be irrational today!” But, that’s my desire. That’s what I want my kids to say about me at the end of the year—my mom? she’s kinda crazy. she doesn’t get it right all the time. in fact, there’s a lot of things she could have done better when I look back on this year. but, she is crazy in a good way about a lot of things and she’s crazy about me. 

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: attachment, why can't they just stay little forever

Breakfast with Santa

12.19.15

A very special little boy for Christmas calls for some some very special fun. I have been seeking out some things we could do together, and this one had me all excited (it may have had something to do with the endless french toast with carmelized banana). Today, we joined a bunch of other families and a lot of Christmas sweaters for Maggiano’s Breakfast With Santa where little sugarplums could eat crispy bacon, eggs, and said french toast until their little hearts and stomachs were content while enjoying hot cocoa from a special North Pole cocoa station and Elf-movie-like decorated cookies (think chocolate sauce, caramel, and marshmallows).

Breakfast with Santa Maggianos King of Prussia collage

Please note Lydia’s raised pinky. She is so red carpet. And, clearly, Drew has followed in his father’s footsteps with his experience of enjoying his bacon.

Breakfast with santa maggiano

As for this little one? He’s all about all-you-can-eat buffets (Exhibit A: the cheeks). What we weren’t sure of was if he’d be all about Santa. We managed to get the quintessential Christmas Santa picture, and I’m very happy to report that all 5 children humored me for it.

Breakfast with Santa maggiano's

Ashlyn’s favorite spot was the cookie decorating station. Merry and bright Lydia went onto the craft area and drew a picture of Santa that she proudly displayed for all to see. Drew made this picture on a star and presented it to NJ, telling him it was Santa on his throne of lies (too much Will Ferrell for us?).

My favorite part of all wasn’t even part of the package deal. All that Santa, sugar-loaded cookies, candy canes in cocoa, and all you can eat french toast put everybody in the Christmas spirit. Jolly old Saint Lydia managed to get all three big kids to sit on her teeny lap and tell her all sorts of silly things they may or may not want for Christmas.

breakfast with santa brunch maggianos

Oh, how I love these kids and those sweet little feet that are sticking out from under the big kids.

Guess the endless french toast and multiple cups of coffee brought out my Christmas spirit too.

NJ at Santa Day with kids in lobby

 

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: why can't they just stay little forever

Pirates vs. Ninjas {Drew’s 15 seconds of GMM fame}

10.27.15

After nearly 2 months of waiting and watching daily to see if he would be a YouTube star, THIS happened while I was in China.

My phone exploded with texts right as were leaving one morning as my family erupted with excitement.

Drew’s totally famous. Like over 800,000 views famous.

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: why can't they just stay little forever

  • « Previous Page
  • 1
  • …
  • 4
  • 5
  • 6
  • 7
  • 8
  • …
  • 50
  • Next Page »

Hello

I overthink everything. This blog is a prime example. Make yourself a cup of coffee and sit down for a read. Actually, make that a pot of coffee. There’s a lot of overthinking here.

Connect

Recent Posts

She’s come a long way

Gift ideas for a happy-China-traveler-to-be

Three gifts.

A letter to my friend on her adoption eve

The day my husband quit his job {reflections 5 years later}

Subscribe to keep up to date via a newsletter

Archives

Popular Posts

  • The day we met Lydia in Xi'an
  • Getting the attachment thing
  • The day my husband quit his job
  • Other places you can find my writing

Follow Along!

Categories

Recent Posts

She’s come a long way

Gift ideas for a happy-China-traveler-to-be

Copyright © 2015 | Design by Dinosaur Stew