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My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

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The post I want to read

7.20.13

Having a little trouble sleeping tonight. It’s because I napped today. So, here I am in bed with my laptop in front of me as my husband is sound asleep beside me. Naps are worse than an afternoon coffee.

As I do the 2013 version of counting sheep (surfing blogs), I’m realizing that I’m subconsciously looking for a post tonight that simply does. not. exist. anywhere. And, for the life of me, I’m wondering why the heck not. I’m looking for a post…oh…somewhere along the lines of the-summer-disorganization-and-constantly-full-sink-is-giving-me-hives or I-really-wish-my-kids-would-sleep-in-longer-so-that-I-can-actually-taste-the-coffee-I-need-in-the-morning-rather-than-drink-it-like-it’s-a-shot-of-vodka or someone-please-remind-me-that-these-creatures-living-in-my-home-completely-dependent-on-me-are-a-blessing or yes-I-absolutely-did-give-my-children-free-license-on-wii-so-that-I-could-take-a-very-long-afternoon-nap. 

hiWhere are they? Instead, all I can find right now are posts about awesome looking recipes out of my budget or motivation to make, Pinteresting crafts that make me say “good for them,” and words that sound like they could be an autobiography from the Proverbs 31 woman (you know she would have been a blogger and had a massive Pinterest following had they been around in 900 B.C.).

Since all those Proverbs 31 women don’t seem to be writing with me in mind this week, I’ll write a few words for myself and the rest of us. They aren’t inspiring words really. And, this post won’t be one that is shared on facebook or tweeted out with the hashtag #mustread.

This mom stuff? It’s not easy. We may have some shining, proud Pinnable moments of fancy birthday cupcakes or clever road-trip games. But, the day after we share them, we’re just normal moms again with kids who never seem to  get enough of us and hearts and schedules divided into too many slices of our blogworthy pie. We have moments of yeah-that-was-a-good-teachable-moment mixed in with seemingly more moments of I’m-glad-no-one-was-with-me-to-witness-that-mom-fail. We ask ourselves, “Is this normal?” But, we’re smart, you know; we know exactly where to turn with our questions—our iPhones—which leads us to think, “Maybe I am the only one because Suzyblogger and JillTweeter are posting about selecting wool and flax and bringing their food from afar while our dinner tonight is likely going to be from a box in my freezer if I can even find one. Does that count as from afar?”

If you’re up late reading this tonight because you gave your kids a little too much screen time so that you could escape for a nap today like me, well done. We’re a little more sane tonight than we would have been had we made another cup of coffee and muscled through painting and stringing wooden beads.

And, while I can’t tell you you’re normal because there’s simply not enough data out there to warrant the use of the term, what I can tell is you’re not alone (clearly, since I’m still up writing this silly post as self-therapy to ease my own conscience).

Tomorrow’s a new day full of hope of a new beginning and less than 105-degree heat in our unairconditioned home. I’ll likely need a second cup of coffee to compensate for this late night which may make me want to grab another nap while some of you are teaching your 4 year olds to read or cook or design cathedrals. Whatever. I’m good if my four brush their teeth without me reminding them more than once and I don’t look at my husband with those eyes that say seriously?-can-you-take-this-issue-on-because-we-may-have-a-REAL-problem-if-I-have-to-handle-this-one.

Good night, moms like me…wherever you are.

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: daily life, parenthood

This picture is deceiving

6.17.13

Ashlyn on horse Oh, this picture so makes our summer look marvelous, doesn’t it?

Bareback pony rides. It’s the epitome of freedom and carefree, is it not? The breeze blowing through your hair from underneath the lovely helmet, just like the old Suave commercials.

They may be riding ponies, but I’m mucking the stalls.

We’re starting Week 2 today of our summer. Lydia’s given up naps which really translates into I’m-only-cute-before-lunch-if-you’re-lucky-and-then-I’m-simply-a-monster-for-the-rest-of-the-day. Evan couldn’t wait until school to end but started with the “I’m bored” routine nearly on Day 1, a phrase that sounds more like nails on a chalkboard than intelligible speech to me. Having all of them home all day somehow translates into a consistently full sink, a lot more laundry (not sure how that happens), an unflushed toilet every time I manage to run away to use it (or hide), no privacy, no quiet, no peace. Yup, I’m mucking away here.

I’m trying to remind myself that these days are precious and fleeting and I should be soaking every minute in. Instead, even they are intentionally distracting me. Drew came into my bedroom the other morning while I was still working on keep my eyelids open and asked me, “What are you going to do with Evan’s room when he goes to college?”

Give me 8 more weeks like the last one and I may have new blueprints for the whole house.

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: Everyday life, parenthood

Dear husband {on Father’s Day}

6.16.13

It’s Father’s Day. I made you a killer brunch this morning (yeah, I did), made sure you had time to read this afternoon (though it meant you had to take someone to ball practice, least you got some quiet), and served you the perfect summer dinner (which included you grilling the burgers–you can’t expect me to use that thing even if it is Father’s Day).

That all was my card to you today, my you-are-the-best-dad-ever card. All the words I could have said—like how I am so glad we’re doing this parenting thing together as a team and how blessed these children are to have a man they can model their lives after and all that stuff—had I said those words, you would have shrugged your shoulders and raised your eyebrows at me. That’s sorta how you are.

So, forget all the words and remember instead the praline crunch bread pudding and fresh raspberries I splurged on. And, more importantly, remember this…

Fathers day pic6

That’s way better than all the gushy words I could pour over you anyhow.

Happy Father’s Day to the best dad ever.

Had to get one in there.

Father's Day group pic

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: parenthood, Traditions

For Pastors on Mother’s Day

5.11.13

for pastor's on mother's dayTomorrow is Mother’s Day. I know you know that already. It’s been on your calendar all year.

Moms are going to come to your Sunday services tomorrow wearing pretty dresses. Some will have been served breakfast in bed; some simply the perfect cup of coffee. Some will have received flowers already that morning. Some will be looking forward to children coming home that day to take them out for lunch. Some will be looking forward to phone calls, hugs, kisses, crayon drawings and homemade cards.

But, Mother’s Day isn’t always that pretty.

There will be women in your church service tomorrow who are aching to become mothers. Some of those women are struggling to make it day-by-day as they endure infertility treatment. Some of those women are single and long to be married and wonder if they will ever have the joy of being a mother.

There will be some women in your church service tomorrow who are mothers but not parents, women who have placed children in other families to be raised by other mothers. They may not look or feel like mothers; they may struggle to define who they are.

There will be some women in your church service tomorrow who were mothers for a short time and didn’t consider themselves that at all, women who ended their pregnancies and motherhood through an abortion and now wonder what life would have been like had they made another choice and chosen life for their child.

There will be some women in your church service tomorrow who are broken mothers, mothers whose relationships with their children are strained at best, mothers who haven’t spoken to their grown children in months or even years, mothers whose children are in rehab or prison or who knows where.

There will be some mothers in your church service tomorrow who are divorced from their children’s father and who are tired, so very tired, whose little ones may not even know it’s Mother’s Day at all.

There will be people in your church service tomorrow who have lost their mothers, people who still have their mothers but have been hurt by them.

And, all those people? They’ve had Mother’s Day on their calendars all year too. But, they aren’t coming to church dressed in their prettiest clothes ready to stand to be recognized. Instead, they wonder if they should come at all. Some are ashamed. Some are resentful. Some are full of grief. Some are angry at the mothers around them, you for pointing them out, and God Himself. Some are simply sad and have already put tissues in their purses in anticipation of the day.

The ones coming to church in their best with smiles on their faces really don’t need to stand for recognition or be publicly thanked. They’ll get all that elsewhere. It’s the others who need you this Sunday. Speak for them.

To the women who are celebrating this Mother’s Day as mothers for the first time, know that we celebrate with you. 

To the women who serve day in and day out to little ones, cleaning noses and bottoms and sippy cups and car seats, know that we applaud you and support you.

To the women who work outside the home to provide for their families, know that we honor you for all that you carry.

To the women who have been celebrated by their families already today or will be later today, know that we take joy in that with you.

To the women who are not yet mothers and who long to be, whose hearts are heavy with that desire today, know that we walk with you through whatever God calls you to today and for days to come.

To the women who wonder what life would be like if they were mothering now the child who could have been theirs, know that we want to hold your hand and encourage you.

To the women who are separated relationally with painful distance between you and your children, know that we hurt with you and pray for reconciliation and trust for you that there is hope for just that.

To the women who are mothers here who haven’t had the recognition from their children and feel forgotten, know that we remember you.

To those who have been hurt by their mothers in some way, who find this day a painful reminder of that hurt, know that we acknowledge your pain and want to offer hope for restoration to you.

To those who are watching their mothers grow older and change or who are grieving the loss of their mothers, know that we grieve with you and pray for comfort for you.

It’s a big day. It’s your challenge…privilege…to communicate God’s love to everyone in your church tomorrow. HE will meet each one just where they are and speak the words they need to hear; don’t stand in the way of that.

No related posts.

Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: parenthood, Uncategorized, words about faith

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