My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

Snapshots of Sensory Stuff

We’re no strangers to sensory processing issues in this house. But, we’re used to parenting a child with sensory sensitivity–one who is bothered by clothing tags and collars on shirts and loud noise and crowds.

Parenting our youngest has been a whole other deal.

This girl is sensory seeking. If there’s a chair or a bench or a step stool, she climbs on it (and then jumps on it and off it and on it and off it). If there’s a puddle, she jumps in it. She moves…constantly. Yup, all the time. If there’s a cup, she pours it out and plays in it. If there’s a basket of anything, she dumps it. If there’s a mess, she’s in it.

We used to think she was trouble seeking rather than sensory seeking.

But, the more I study her and the more I read and learn, the more I understand her and all her “trouble-seeking” ways.

She needs more vestibular and tactile stimulation that most kids her age–those fancy words just mean she needs more balance and big movement type of stimulation and lots and lots of touch. And, that really shouldn’t surprise us. Those senses are the ones most fed during those very early baby months. When babies are supposed to be picked up, rocked, held, bounced, touched, and tickled, she spent most her time in a crib.

So, I’m trying to give her an extra dose of vestibular and tactile stuff these days. My concerted effort this week – a rice box.

And, she loved it.

Burying toys, digging them up, filling cups, dumping cups, stepping in the bin, wiggling those toes, letting the rice run between her fingers….and onto my floor.

My attempt to clean this up seemed rather futile. I was getting so frustrated feeling a single rice grain under my bare feet after multiple floor clean ups that I was starting to think I had sensory problems. 
Rice box got kicked to the curb. Literally. Where Lydia proceeded to bury and dig and play and so forth and so forth until my driveway looked like we hosted a wedding here. 

I’ve been getting ideas from The Out-of-Sync Child Has Fun: Activities for Kids with Sensory Processing Disorder. It’s packed full of clever little ways to help our kids with sensory processing stuff goin’ on.

Got any ideas your kiddos love?

Ni Hao Yall

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Bare Naked Lady

Can you guess what we’ve been doing lately?

It’s all going quite well.

Though I think she’s using it as an excuse to just be naked all day.

And, I’m not fighting her on it. 
This mama’s choosing her battles. 
Naked vs. clothes just isn’t one of them.

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Progress

God has a way of moving at just the right time, doesn’t He?

Just as we started our Empowered to Connect Train-the-Trainer course, Lydia stepped it up.

The yelling. The hitting. The going from 0-60 in seconds. Throw in a bite or two, and that’s been our world for the last month.

Plenty of opportunities to practice what we’re learning. And, that we have.
Giving her the words to use (“I can see you are mad. That makes you super mad, doesn’t it?”… “You don’t like when I do that, do you? You can tell me that.”).
Giving her the redos (“Wait a minute. What don’t you try that again.”).
And, giving her a stop sign when warranted (“Lydia, you need to stop that right now, and use words that we can understand!”
We have so much to learn.
A few days ago, my invitation to get in the bath wasn’t accepted, and she was angry. She looked right into my eyes, bent over with her arms flung back, and yelled out, “I…want…to…hit you!” 
“Thank you for using your words! Good job!” 
She still had to get in the bath. But, she got some praise and a hug first which unnerved her enough that the anger dissipated.
And, yesterday, she snagged something right out of Mark’s hands with a “Let I have dat!” Mark simply looked at her with a message she clearly got, and she handed it back and said, “Let I try that again,” and then asked for it.
Progress.
And, today, as Mama went out to breakfast with some other adoptive mamas (a breakfast that didn’t bring me home until 2pm), she soaked up time with Daddy, asking to be held “like a baby” and falling asleep in his arms for 25 minutes. Tonight, she wanted him to feed her her bottle, and she laid close to his chest while he held it for her. 
Learning to use words. Redos. 
Progress.

Ni Hao Yall

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Change = Challenge

I should have anticipated it.

All the squeals of delight and jumping up and down about bunk beds somehow distracted me. It didn’t even dawn on me that maybe taking down the crib and putting up bunk beds, one of which would be assigned to this 3 1/2 year old to actually sleep in, would be really really hard on said 3 1/2 year old.

The last 2 days have been a challenge. Nearly every word out of her mouth has been a loud pitched scream. And most of those loud pitched screams have included the words, “No!” and “WHY!!!” (the latter of which is more of an exclamation than a question). When she’s not screaming, she’s hitting. I tell her to finish her dinner; she hits me. I tell her it’s time to go; she hits me. She walks into a room; she hits her brother who is sitting and playing wii before he even sees her coming. Her sister tries to give her a hug; she hits her.

You get the idea.

The behavior issues we have had over the last couple months have just become magnified about 10x in the last 2 days.

Just when I was throwing my hands up wondering why in the world this girl is freaking out and making me freak out at the same time, she it hit me.

Her room is totally different. Her crib, the only bed she’s known with us, the one she slept in from Day 1 in our family is gone. Some furniture is different as beds and nightstands all got shuffled around in the kids’ rooms. And, what is there is all in different places. She says she loves the bunk beds; and everyone has reinforced that kind of talk. But, the change, I think, has overwhelmed her even if she can’t put words to it.

I’ve got lots of opportunities to practice all we’re learning in our Empowered to Connect training.

I’ve given her words to use. I’ve given her “redos” so she can get another chance to make the right choice. And, I’ve given her consequences.

Don’t let these pictures fool you. Taking them here today was an act of obedience on my part.

My goal – get some of that anxious energy out. Bring cortisol levels down and endorphin levels up. 
And, okay, maybe tire her out in the process. 
Guess it worked because she fell sound asleep IN the bunk bed without (much) of a fight. 
She woke up earlier than she typically does, but she was smiling and found me and said, “Thank you for setting up my bunk bed!” 
Mission (seemingly) accomplished. 

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