Kelly Archives - Page 3 of 12

Day 6: Overthinking and a Plea for Alea

5.23.12

I got what seemed like only a few moments this morning to talk to Mark. But, I was so thankful for it. Every little story he shares makes my heart ache for China and makes me long to be there with him.

He told me of one student who didn’t want to share her Chinese name with him. When he asked why, it was because her name is a boy’s name and she’s embarrassed by it. She told Mark her father had wanted a boy not a daughter. She lives day to day embarrassed that her name itself communicates that everyday of her life.

He told me about another girl who sat beside him during “club” where they sing songs and have fun and laugh with the students. She couldn’t see the screen with the words of the song in front of her though she was in the front row. She borrowed a boy’s glasses but still was squinting. Mark watched as she used her phone to take a picture of the screen so that she could hold it up close to her eyes to read it and sing along. Mark asked her why she wasn’t wearing glasses; she said she had some but she was too embarrassed to wear them. She felt ugly and old looking in them. So, she’d rather be nearly blind.

I hear these and other stories from him, and my heart aches to be there and pour into these girls.

I look at the picture emailed to me today.

Mark and our godson Caleb, the first and only child of Frank and Helen. He is clearly so loved. All their parental love poured into him.

My heart longs to tell him how special he is, how prayed for he is, how he is thought of from across the world.

As I am thinking today about my husband across the world totally out of his comfort zone but thriving and the college student ashamed of her name and what that means about her and the college student willing to live with blinded eyes when clear sight is possible and a baby boy who is learning about love from two very faithful, devoted parents, I find myself also thinking about another little girl only about 2 hours from where Mark is now.

Her name is Alea.

I’ve found emails in my inbox about her recently, emails I confess I’ve wanted to delete–somethings seem too hard to think about. But, I can’t escape. I’ve read blog posts about her and seen her picture online. And, I can’t not think about her especially knowing that right now as I am ending my day and Mark is starting his day teaching, she too is starting her day so close to where he is.

And, she’s sick. Very, very sick.

Unlike Caleb, she is not with parents who consider her the apple of their eyes. She lives at New Day Foster Home with other orphans, all children with medical needs of some kind. Alea, born with hilary atresia, can only live about 10 months at most without a liver transplant. Her precious little body will begin to shut down, and she will die. The New Day staff is doing all they can for her, pouring into her everything they have. But, their resources are so limited. She’s in the hospital in Beijing now. Pre-op is done. They now wait for a liver in a country where organ donation is nearly unheard of. And, they are praying for money. A lot of money. $65,000 in fact. That’s how much Alea’s surgery will cost, and that amount is astronomical for New Day. They’ve raised $7,500 so far, leaving over $55,000 to go.

And, here I am. In front of my Macbook. Overthinking.

Wondering how God will provide for this precious baby. Thankful for those who are working so hard on her behalf, advocating for her. Wondering how the staff there handle living with and caring for children hurting as she is–it has to be only by God’s grace.

Thankful for Caleb and the light he brings to his parents. Wondering what his future will be like. Wondering if he will follow in his parents’ footsteps.

Wondering about the life of those two girls Mark mentioned quickly to me. Wondering about all the other stories, each student of the 500 in that hall where Mark and the team have “club” and give lectures.

Wondering how those stories will change my husband.

Wondering what my daughter’s life would have been like had things been different in some way.

Wondering if we will go back there together again.

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I encourage you to visit the Hope for Alea blog. I know it’s hard; but don’t avoid her story. Consider being a part of the Red Envelope Fundraiser taking place right now to raise the $65,000 needed to pay for Alea’s life-saving liver transplant. And, watch what God does.

Day 5: Rolling

5.22.12

Got a 20 minute call with Mark this morning which was the highlight of my day.

Things are rolling – the team members are in the classrooms at the university teaching. Friendships are being built. Everyone is learning quite a bit–teachers and students alike, it seems. The students’ English skills aren’t as good as Mark was expecting, and it’s hard. But, he clearly was smiling when he talked with me this morning (which made me smile for most of the day), excited about the opportunities in front of him to both serve the kids there and serve the teachers who are there long term.

And, things are rolling here – another school week began, grocery shopping done, lunches made, homework complete, leftovers on paper plates for dinner, surfing Craigslist for bunk beds (see previous post). Just rolling along.

This, however, is not doing much rolling.

I got a lesson on how to get the thing turned on before Mark left. I mistakenly assumed it would work sort of like a vacuum cleaner that has that nice wheely like thing underneath that makes it sort of move without much effort.

Wrong.

Using this thing is worse than pushing a double stroller with a buggy board around Disney World.

And, my yard is proof of that. I feel like I need to put a yard sign out that says:

NOTE – yard care provider out of the country for a time. Have mercy.

Good news is that I was worried Mark would come home to a wife 5 lbs. heavier after all that yummy carny food from last week. But, I mowed the lawn today, so I think I’m good.

Not good enough though to make myself one of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup milkshakes I made the 3 big kids tonight.

Yup, still sugaring them up. And, they’re loving it.

Off to watch an old episode of The Guardian which I’m currently hooked on and then get some editing work done before I collapse.

Day 5. Over and out.

Day 4: Mr. China

5.21.12

My heart was aching for Sunday morning.

It feels like my mission trip on the homefront has been more about running around and way too much sugar than serving with a servant’s heart for His glory. And so, my soul was ready for worship this morning, for refreshment and a reminder–and for a few moments to myself as every child went to his or her perspective Sunday School.

A song, one of my favorites, moved me, broke me.

Where you go, I’ll go.
Where you stay, I’ll stay.
When you move, I’ll move.
I will follow you.
Who you love, I’ll love.
How you serve, I’ll serve.
If this life I lose, I will follow you.
I will follow you.

And, that’s what we’re doing–wanting to do, trying to do, even during hard days.

Where He goes, he’ll go.

Where He stays, I’ll stay.

I got a few minutes late last night on Skype with Mark. I could barely hear him as he tried talking to me in the middle of a crowded apartment and lots going on. After he gave me the details of what they were doing and how things were and what things were like, I asked him how he was really doing. He smiled and said, “It’s uncomfortable.”

Yeah, it is. The work in conversation to understand each other. Being upfront and “on” all the time. The energy required.

But, Mark’s loving and serving and following. And, as uncomfortable as that is, I know–and he knows–it’s right where he should be.

In honor of Ashlyn’s Chinese dance performance this afternoon

which the other children were so excited to be a part of

(I did make them look up during her actual song, promise)

and in honor of our very own Mr. China,

we did dinner in style.

Bet Daddy’s Chinese food today didn’t end with these bad boys though.

My special Cookies and Cream milkshakes which Drew assured me were the best milkshakes I had ever made.

More running around. And, more sugar. But, purpose remembered.

Day 4 done.

Day 3: Life’s a Parade

5.20.12

I’ve said more than once–okay, a lot more than once–that if I don’t do it, it won’t get done. You know, the endless parade of dishes, crumbs under the kitchen table, dirty socks thrown in the corner with the shoes that may lead some to believe I have 7 children or 4 children with more than 2 feet each, beds that need to be made, stacks of mail on the dining room table.

It wasn’t really true.

I’m realizing now that my husband does a whole lot more around here than I recognized. Because on Day 3 of him gone, I can say emphatically that if I don’t do it, it really won’t get done. And, a lot isn’t.

But, that’s okay for now. Because all of my children are sound asleep in their beds right now, beds that may not get made tomorrow. And, I’m in bed early myself, content from a full day of being together including hanging out on the sidelines of the longest parade ever (we’re convinced that the Dogwood parade breaks world records for the longest parade per capita). We didn’t even make it to the end–and I was okay with that.