Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption
Thailand also means time with some Chinese friends who came as well. And Chinese friends means some very special little people.
But, don’t tell Caleb I said so. He is quite big now and does not want to be called little.
Grace on the other hand? She prefers to be called all sorts of other titles like a Chinese phrase that means something like princess flower. That girl is spicy. I told her parents it’s the American in her.
On this morning, two years ago, I was holding my breath. So was the woman before me. She clutched her side and tried to convince us all that she wasn’t as far along in labor as she was. The next 90 minutes were like an episode of Amazing Race with the end goal being a brand new baby girl.
We fought against a family planning policy that limited this family to two children or one son {meaning, if their first child was a girl, they were allowed to have a second child to try again for a boy. Their first child was a boy.}. We fought against immigration policies and all sorts of policies that make it hard for a woman and a child to leave their country and enter ours. We fought against our own selfishness and self-protection and inclination to say mine mine mine with our home and our food and our things.
And, we won. With help from a lot of people, we won. And, as a result, one of the most beautiful little creatures ever created entered the world…here…in the land of the free and the brave…to a mama who is one of the bravest people I know.
Today, that beautiful little creature turns two.
And, she’s just as marvelous as she was then…especially when she sends me messages on WeChat saying “Aunt Kelly.”
Two days after Grace turned 7 months old, China announced a big change to their family planning policy that had been in effect for three decades. As of the start of 2016, families across the nation would be allowed two children regardless of the children’s gender. Unfortunately, the law is not retroactive. So, over a year after the law change, Grace is still considered an illegal birth. Despite the fact that she holds U.S. citizenship, in order to register her in China for her ID card so that she can go to school, receive benefits allowed to their citizens, and even buy train tickets, her parents are still being told they will need to pay an exorbitant fine not required for second children born only 9 months after her.
We will keep praying for more changes, better changes, and for this child who He’s going to use for big, big things. He already has.
The little boy who arrived in our home 2 years ago is now a big boy. He’s in the third and final year of full-day kindergarten complete with three meals a day and 2 snacks (as that works here and as I know because he told me “eating” is his favorite part of school). And, I’m told that the doorman there believes that his 6 months in America made him a “different kind of boy” who is more “polite and smart about the world.”
And, this sweet baby? Our little Gracie girl?
Don’t let the short hair fool you; she’s no baby anymore. She’s captivating. She’s feisty and determined and independent and wants her way. I tell Frank and Helen that it must be the American in her too.
Best of all? She melted my heart with this today.
This sweet child has her own following (and rightfully so). So, she gets her own post just of glimpses of her sweetness.
I confess that my heart broke a little when she gave me that scowl and pulled away, leaning back into her mama and making it abundantly clear that I was only good for the sunglasses she wanted to try on. But, in that same moment, I am also overwhelmingly thankful that she has that deep connection to her mama and that their family is what it is. And, when I feel that, my heart no longer breaks for her not remembering me but for all those who don’t have that connection yet.
