Dear friend,

She was just a baby when we first met her. They let us hold her but shook their heads when we tried to take her picture. Here, what about this one? Someone will want this one. We’d agree. Yes, yes, he is precious, a treasure. You’re right. But, can we see her too? 

It wasn’t that they didn’t care about her; we witnessed how they did firsthand. But, just a few years ago, their hands were tied. Someone somewhere put a red stamp on a rule that said no children from this orphanage with her disease were made available for adoption. 

But, that has changed. At some point in the last 3 years, someone at some higher level noticed that children with Down Syndrome from other orphanages were getting families, that families wanted to see them and when they did, they saw them as precious and desired to make them sons and daughters. I don’t know if there was an edict with another red stamp or what. But, whatever was decided and sent out meant that Eden was given a chance.

She’s not a baby anymore. She’s a big girl, and she wants people to know that (just like any little one her age does). She also wants people to know she’s pretty smart. Her nannies want people to know that too (hence the video I was sent showing off her hard work on stacking squares). They aren’t turning the cameras away anymore; they want her seen and seen as precious. So do I.

Tomorrow, mothers all over the states will be getting crayon-colored cards and wildflowers. My guess is you’re one of those mothers. I want you to be encouraged that what you are doing is good, that your mothering is significant and worth all the hard. But, I want you to be a bit unsettled and uncomfortable too. Hear me out. I want you to see this sweet one and be rocked a bit. I want you to hear part of her story here and wonder if you should be in the next part of it. I want you to consider that maybe just maybe she belongs at your breakfast table, that maybe just maybe you’re the mommy she needs to know her preciousness, that maybe just maybe the red stamp she needs next is the one that will make her your daughter.

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“Eden” is eligible for adoption through Madison Adoption Associates and is still waiting despite her super cute pigtails and superb stacking skills. Email me or Sarah@madisonadoption.org right away for more information. They only have her file for a short time longer.

He’s a hard kid to match. On paper, he’s a hard match. 7 years old. Serious heart condition. And, he’s a boy.

“Help this one,” the nannies told me. “He’s open and clever. He’s a good boy.” I nodded and agreed. Yes, he’s so sweet. yes, I’ll help him. But, I know he’s a hard match.

Day 1. He loved the dollar store echo microphone and ran around with it like a game show host, inviting others to speak into it and marvel at the sound it made (and the way it made all the grown ups jump). Of course, this was made better via stickers and funny poses.

Day 2. He thought the flippy ball thing was pure magic. He and his buddies smiled for the camera, all of them requesting to see each shot on the screen after it was taken. And, he sang EIEIO with some serious passion acting out a tiger, chicken, rabbit (what does a bunny say?), and elephant. Apparently, American farms are seriously boring compared to Chinese ones.

Day 4. He walked hand in hand with a new friend at the zoo, calling out to her with “Ayi!” to get her to admire along with him the pandas and the giraffes and the hippos. (Again, an experience clearly sweetened by stickers.)

“Help this one,” they said again as we prepared to leave. “Yes, he’s so sweet. I promise I’ll try.” And, I meant it. After all, he’s an easy kid to match. He’s animated and social, well loved and content. Everybody likes him. And, he’s pretty incredibly adorable with the stickers and microphone.

I heard that he crossed his arms and refused to go to kindergarten class the day after we left. “I won’t go unless the Americans are here,” he told his teacher. That sweet teacher smiled and said, “Okay, that’s fine. Wait to go to school again until they come for you.” That seemed to satisfy him enough to get him to comply. And, I’m pretty sure he’ll be singing EIEIO until then.

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“Wayland” has been waiting for someone to come for him and is eligible for adoption through Madison Adoption Associates for only 2 more weeks as of today. He’s labeled “special focus” which means that any family regardless if they are paper ready or just considering adoption for the first time can say yes to him. Email me personally or Sarah@madisonadoption.org, who works for Madison Adoption Associates, for more information.

Most pictures (aka the really good ones) courtesy of Nicole from Living Out His Love. Video courtesy of an ayi who wanted me to know that the children and she missed us. 

Dear “Quinn”

You were so quiet when I met you in October. But, I understand. I would have been quiet too. Your foster mother placed you before me and put a sign in your hands with your name and your birthday on it written on it. She told you to say your name and perform for me. You obeyed but spoke so quietly that I could barely hear your voice. Your foster mother tried to nudge you along with a lot of words I couldn’t understand. I tried to assure you that it was okay. I’m sorry you couldn’t understand all my words. When she realized you weren’t going to show me what she had hoped, your foster mother took out her phone and started pulling up videos of you. She showed me you singing along with pop songs, when you made up your own dance and performed for her as she did laundry, you chatting away to your foster father at a restaurant. She pinched her own cheeks and laughed; you eat well and are cute and round but don’t like when people call you chubby. Good for you, sweet girl, for saying so! She went back to her phone, quickly scrolling through hundreds of pictures until she found some from when you were just a baby. She paused and admired your cuteness herself and then invited me to admire you too. You’ve been in her care for a long time, and she has done a good job. But, she wants her job to end. I know that’s hard to imagine because she loves you so much. But, I know it’s true because she wants you to have a family. You are loved in her home, but you are not a daughter and cannot be. And, she so wants you to be able to be a daughter. She wants your name to no longer announce to the world that you do not belong. She wants a daddy and a mommy to claim you and make you theirs, to give you a new name that goes before you and says “this girl is no longer alone. She has a future!”

She showed me a lot of pictures and a lot of videos that day. Then, she turned to you and put her hand on your head and looked at me and asked me to find a family for you.

Sweet child, I will be your storyteller. I will tell everyone who will listen about how your foster sister is your best friend and how excited you were to show me your new coat and how you wanted to make sure people saw your special piggy tails that your foster mother gave you for a day trip out to the zoo. I will tell everyone to be thankful for the label of “delayed” that someone gave you when you were little because you were behind your friends. After all, it’s that label that makes it possible for a family who may not have even started any paperwork to say yes to you. And, I am praying someone will say yes to you very soon not just because you need a family but because I know there’s a family who needs you.

 

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“Quinn” is eligible for adoption through Madison Adoption Associates and is still waiting despite her super endearing roundness and dance moves. Email me or Sarah@madisonadoption.org for more information.