9. The last year as one single digit. That’s big.

This day, in 2002, here we were. Me after the hardest thing I had ever done–labor and delivery. And, Evan, a total miracle child, meeting the world for the first time.

We marveled at the gift God had given us. 

And, we were pretty much clueless. Oh, how I cried when my mom left after helping me for a week. I had no idea what I was doing and why in the world anyone would trust me to take care of this little person. I felt so inadequate and just tried to figure things day by day.

9 years later. Some things have changed…and some things have not. Evan’s no longer a baby; and, I’m no longer a new mom whose daily life pretty much revolves around one baby’s nap schedules and feedings. Evan’s 9–he likes robots and spaceships and legos and books and going to museums. And, I’m a mom balancing working from home part-time, Bible studies, some exciting stuff in the adoption community, 2 kids in elementary school, one kid in preschool, and one toddler who goes with me everywhere. But, Evan still needs me…just as much as he did 9 years ago. And, I’m still the clueless mom who often finds myself feeling the same way I did a week after he was born when Mom waved goodbye and headed home, leaving me with my baby….my baby. As much as I’d like to be the expert with 4 kids who has it all together. I’m just not. 

And, I am certainly reminded of that this month in particular as we have 3 birthdays to celebrate in our family (Lydia, Evan, and Drew). And, well, that makes this clueless Mama feel even a little more clueless. 3 birthdays in a row coupled with Lydia’s family day in there as well–that’s a lot going on to handle.

But, Evan didn’t seem to mind my pulling things together somewhat last minute. A lego party it was yesterday with just us and one set of cousins who were in town for the big kids’ sale we do twice a year–just what he wanted. We decorated–I mean, built–lego necklaces and headed to Chick Fil A (Evan’s fave) where we designed our own lego minifigures to put together in a book and ate a cookie cake made to look like a lego board…sort of. Evan picked out favors off Etsy to give each kid–lego minifigure crayon packs.

 (Had to include this snapshot–this is her picture smile. Totally cracks me up.)

He woke on his birthday to all the door decorations we have done every year.

And, after church, Mark took the 3 big kids to the movies while I took Lydia home for her nap and enjoyed some peace and quiet while getting some work done. I love this picture and the text at the top. Mark suggested maybe moms need Mars rather than Mars needing moms. 

 9. Crazy. It’s kind of a big deal. What a handsome man he’s become.