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My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

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I can’t wait any longer; he can’t wait any longer. {Advocating}

11.15.13

Qui Le 3

I can’t wait any longer.

On June 22, 2012, I posted his picture on Facebook. I fell for him hard. Paper ready and waiting since 2009 and I could not figure out why. He wasn’t abandoned at birth; he needed medical care that his family clearly couldn’t handle. He had a tumor on his kidney. The orphanage stepped up, got him the care he needed. Today, he is healthy except for one very big special need that none of us can overlook—he needs a family.

There was a family who had locked his file. In fact, he waited for them for a year and was prepared for them coming—as much as orphanage staff typically do with care packages and such. They went to China this summer; sadly, they did not come home with a son. They received him and had him with them at their hotel for over a week but ultimately decided they would escort him back to the orphanage and come home.

My heart was broken. There were no words I could offer to change anything about it. Believe me, I tried. I grieved hard. It hurt, and I have tried over the last several months to put his images aside, to forget those big dark eyes, to uncurl his fingers from around my heart and move on.

But, he hasn’t. So, I can’t.

This boy has experienced things a 7 year old boy should never experience. He’s fought for his life. He’s endured chemotherapy and all that comes with that by himself. Over the years, he’s likely learned that the only one he can trust is himself and that has impacted his response to the world. But, his heart can heal just as his body has healed. He is not without hope.

Amy Eldredge of Love Without Boundaries shared a story of an older orphan boy who had watched two of his friends leave to become sons and return to the orphanage later to become orphans once again. When asked what adoption was, he replied, “Adoption is when a family takes you home and then brings you back to the orphanage.”

I cannot wait any longer; he shouldn’t wait any longer. This boy is not currently available for adoption; once the family who was his for a year returned him, he hasn’t been made available to another. He needs a family to pursue him, go after him, commit to finding him and bringing him home no matter what. I’m told that if a family pursues, his paperwork will be found.

His name means Autumn Joy.

Qui Le 2 Qui Le

 

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: Advocating

Rachel Crow. {Sorry, you missed the best part}

11.12.13

Hi. I got to talk to a rockstar from my living room. I know, cool, right?

I prepared my questions and was all ready to go. Sweet Rachel Crow, she listened, she seemed genuinely honored to have some 37-year-old mother of four ask her questions. Yeah, she humored me.

For 8 minutes and 28 seconds, we talked adoption.

And, while the recorded interview is one worth watching, all of you missed the best part. Sorry.

At the end of the interview, this 37-year-old inexperienced interviewer stayed on the line. And, I’m just going to put this right on out there, apparently, no one realized I was there. My “Hello? Hello? I’m still here?”s didn’t mean much when they had me muted.

Then, the best part of whole interview happened (without me, mind you).

Rachel started talking to her mom.

Can you hear me? Could you see me? How did I do?

Oh, honey, you did great. You are doing just great. Good job.

…

There I was, totally eavesdropping, waiting for someone interview-official of some sort to come on and tell me, “You can hang up now.” I had no idea what I was doing. But, what I heard over the next couple minutes as I waited (until I realized I was beginning to look creepy) truly was the best part of the whole interview. I heard a daughter, inviting her mother in, asking her for help, looking for the pat on the back. I heard a mother, present and interested, who didn’t want to be anywhere else but in that studio watching her daughter talk to complete strangers and sharing hard stuff, giving her gentle feedback, providing exactly what she needed.

THAT is the interview for foster care and adoption I’m sharing with you even though there’s nothing to show you, no recording, no transcript.

Foster care and adoption, the brokenness that they start with–that’s hard stuff. But, the relationship and reconciliation and redemption that they bring about–that’s what this month is all about.

Thank you, Rachel and Rachel’s mom, for a beautiful 2-3 minute interview that I was only an eavesdropper for.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: adoption

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