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My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

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#TogetherCalled to rest

2.21.14

together called 2014 fireI’ve realized something lately. I’ve realized it over the last few months as we’ve prepared for this day. I’ve seen it; I’ve experienced it. There’s a lot of weary going around. It is not the kind of weary that means tired. Being tired is something a good night’s sleep and a tall cup of coffee can fix. It’s deeper than that. It’s w e a r y, an exhaustion that fills what can seem like a never ending season of winter.

We added something new to Together Called this year. Some couples come this weekend to be fed and simply be able to reconnect with each other. That’s great. Other couples come to Together Called to be fed, maybe reconnect with each other, but also connect with other couples who “get it.” This year, we wanted to be intentional about helping them do that. The weekend goes by fast, so we have tried to do some work ahead of time so that they can skip some of the higher level conversation and get to the conversation that we all really are looking for anyway. We asked couples to fill out an online survey of sorts, noting areas they could use someone’s connection and areas where they may be able to pour into others.

As the responses came in, the weariness became visibly apparent in the form of an Excel spreadsheet on the screen in front of us. Nearly 1/4 of the couples coming this weekend shared that they fell into the category of coming up for air and asked for someone to connect with them to encourage them.

Weary.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. -Matthew 11:28

That’s what we want these couples to get this weekend. We’ve got great stuff planned, gifted speakers, good food, warm fires. But, we don’t want Together Called to be their tall cup of coffee. We want to point them to the One who called them in the first place and calls them still when they’re in the hard places and when things seem to be working out okay.

We are coming weary and burdened. We pray that we will leave having experienced rest and understanding that life with Jesus can be rest even in the midst—perhaps more so in the midst—of brokenness and the tender pain of the grafting process, that He desires to us to experience rest in Him because He is our Father and simply loves us because we are His.

Come, friends. Come, and let’s share the weariness and find rest together.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: adoption, The Sparrow Fund

From an outnumbered biological child in an adoptive family {guest post}

2.19.14

Because an intro really isn’t needed. Simply read these words from a friend’s son…the only biological child in a family with soon-to-be 8 children.

________________________________________

Munari familyTo be able to call myself a racial and ethnic minority in my own family is a privilege not many people can say. The ability to love and provide for a child not of their own flesh is a truly remarkable gift, a gift my family has been blessed with. The everyday struggles of family living is amplified by the truth that my brothers and sisters did come from different parents, that they were born into a situation very different than my own, a dynamic that effects all aspects of their character and relationships for better or worse. The path of adoption is a lifelong journey, a condensation of the full spectrum of human emotion. Through my humble role in the evolution of my family I have been shaped to view the world in a way very different than many of my contemporaries. To care for the needy, the weakest, and the most vulnerable is the greatest privilege and responsibility handed to me.

Adoption is the expression of the most pure and undefiled response to those in need, a response of grace and love. It is the quintessential story of redemption, the desolation and brokenness of the orphaned child is restored in full. However, the most resounding and beautiful feature of such a flawless ideal is that it is carried out by flawed people who dare to step out to help those in need. Many factors impacted the situations surrounding my sibling’s adoptions, the reasons why their biological parents could not take care of them. Disease, poverty, death, and drug abuse are all brutal truths that are part of my siblings past, and therefore a part of them and a part of our family. I have three brothers and three sisters in my family, all of whom have been adopted. Three of them are biological siblings we have just brought into our home a year ago hail from the proud African nation of Ethiopia. The pain of loss, the uncertainty of their future, and the isolation of living in an orphanage are still very fresh in their minds. Their buried emotions can manifest out of nowhere, triggered by a seemingly insignificant sight or smell that connects them back their home or parents in Ethiopia. As a family we understand that these experiences are a part of their character, and as our family identity transforms to equal the sum of all of its diverse parts, we are encouraged to keep our hearts and minds open to those who seek fulfillment.

Because of my unique exposure to these misfortunes of the world, my eyes have been opened. I have been given an invaluable insight into the pain, suffering, and loneliness through out the world, a gift I cannot begin to fathom, for it is this awareness which defines me. The realization that I am fundamentally different from most of my peers is sobering, and makes me grateful to be who I am. To live inside of a bubble, to be caught up in the comfort and ease of living in suburbia, to not experience differerent cultures from my own, to turn a blind eye towards the issues of the world, is effortlessly easy and is to often idealized in our society. To many people, their ultimate goal in life is to seclude themselves from those in need, to distance themselves through wealth, status and location. A willing ignorance of the problems faced by the orphaned, abandoned, and destitute is ingrained in our culture. For many, this illusion remains unbroken their whole lives, but I have been granted a glimpse behind the curtain of self-deception, and I will answer the cry of the orphan.

________________________________________

I’d like to be in that room when that college admission officer reads that one.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: adoption, guest post

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