My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

Our penpal {advocating}

I met him and his foster mother, but he wasn’t so happy to talk to me and join in with the other kids. He’s an orphan too, but he’s been in a foster home; he doesn’t know the children here and older than most of them too. I tried to talk to him, but I didn’t get too much. I didn’t even get the chance to take a picture of him. And, I regretted it because I knew his papers were at Madison right now. And, I really did want to help him.

So, I found his foster family on WeChat. It sounds so simple put that way. It wasn’t really. But, all the effort has been worth it because Drew and I now have a Chinese penpal.

 

B: Hello. My name is PQB. I like playing football. I like reading. I want to be an inventor when I grow up.

Me: Wow! You are smart! I saw you on Monday at the orphanage. You did not seem very happy. Are you shy?

B: It’s not that I’m upset. I got a little dizzy in the car.

Me: Oh! I am sorry!

…

B: Did you have barbecue for dinner?

Me: We did! Do you like that? We made “hot dogs.”

B: Love! Very good!

…

Me: Do you want to have a family in America and live there forever?

B: Oh yeah! Summer! Fun! I like swimming best. I swim 100 meters at a time.

Me: Summer is fun. No school and lots of activities. But, summer is short. Do you want to learn English and go to school in America and do homework in America?

B: Yeah, I’d love to. But not doing homework in America. :( :(

Me: Great. If you want to, then I want to help you. It is okay to feel a little nervous about all of that. Do you feel a little nervous?

B: A little bit.

Me: It is normal to be a little nervous. Every child is nervous about coming to America. It is a big change.

B: Schools in China are under a lot of stress.

Me: Yes, I know. You work so hard. Schools in America might be a little hard for you. But teachers here do not lecture as much. I am sure you would like science class since you like to know how things work.

B: Can we learn about the invention of electrical appliances?

Me: Yes, you can! Would you like that?

B: yes.

…

B: I like skateboarding.

Me: Wow! Cool!

B: We all went cycling today. Are you going to work?

Me: No. Not on Sunday. I will go to church and spend time with my family today.

B: Oh! Can you send me a video?

…

Drew: I like Legos. Do you?

B: Can you send me a video? I love inventing electrical appliances.

Drew: me too.

B: I’m looking at today’s headlines to see inventions. Invention is very popular. I’m happy to meet you.

…

B: When can I go to America?

Me: I am trying to help you come. A family wanted to adopt you but the rules are very strict, and they could not qualify.

B: Oh. Well, thank you.

Me: Tell me what kind of family you want.

B: With dad, mom, brothers. Family must like me.

Me: Of course :)

…

B’s foster family: I want to know, why didn’t the family from last year adopt him?

Me: I don’t know exactly. But it is a good question. Maybe they were not qualified.

B’s foster family: He must not be up to the mark.

Me: That is not it. He is a good boy. They liked him.

B’s foster family: Oh really? There are other problems.

Me: Can you please explain?

B’s foster family: Maybe he is too thin.

Me: That is no problem. His height and weight are not a problem.

B’s foster family: Maybe he did not study English with his heart. Maybe he played mobile games all day. There must be a reason.

B’s foster family: He’s been living with us for 10 years. Built a strong bond with our family. But I am happy to have a family adopt him! …He deserves it!

“Max” is 12 years old, is healthy, and currently available for adoption through Madison Adoption Associates. The family must like him. :) Email me or Sarah@madisonadoption.org for more information. Madison only has his file for a short time longer, and he really deserves a family.

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It’s time to recharge

It’s amazing outside today. The trees are so colorful, and the air is simply quintessential Fall. It’s the perfect afternoon to sip on a hot decaf coffee (which I’m presently doing), and the perfect afternoon for our men to head out to recharge.

I’ve had very little to do with the whole plan for the next 3 days really. Last winter, Mark approached me at my desk and announced that he and his buddy Matt had decided to do a men’s retreat. I was kinda shocked given that I’m usually the one to make crazy statements like that (which in the past have led to hosting a marriage retreat or something like another child, just for two examples). These guys championed this whole darn thing including choosing the menu and booking a ropes course 40 feet up in the air. All I did was help to promote it a little–okay, Matt’s wife Wanda and I may or may not have also gathered a few goodies for each guy and s’more supplies.

It’s 2pm now, and I’ve already gotten a text from Matt with a picture of all the name tags and swag bags set up, seemingly bragging that they were able to get it done without any help from the ladies. I’m told that by 4pm, Matt, Mark, and Zach, who got roped into this whole deal, will be standing next to all those goodies ready to welcome the rest of the dudes. I’m smiling just imagining the scene sans the social girls by their sides. They’ll eat dinner together tonight and then meet for the first of four gathering times over the next three days where they will hear truth, be challenged, and encourage each other.

I have no idea what it will look like. I guarantee that it won’t look the way our marriage retreat looks or the way a women’s retreat would look or the way I WOULD want it to look if I were running this thing. But, I’m not. They are. And, that is such a good thing. Because, you know what? It really doesn’t matter what it looks like; what matters is that there are 23 men on their way out now or heading out soon who are gathering together, all sharing the desire to grow and do what they’ve been called to do more fully, as healed, whole, and holy men. It’s pretty overwhelming to think about.

Would you join me in praying for each one of these guys–Matt, Zach, and Mark included–that God would meet each one of them wherever they are as they arrive tonight, that they’d know more deeply God’s love for them, and that God would use these next 3 days to recharge them to be the men, husbands, and fathers that He wants them to be.

 

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