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My Overthinking

Philly Area mom, Life forever changed by adoption

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the big brother {news}

8.25.15

A lot of people read about L C.G. right here. A handful of folks emailed me asking for more information. Some wanted to help. Some really were considering if they could bring him home. But, there was one thread of messages among the others that stood out, one that I kept coming back to you because she kept coming back to it as well.

I didn’t know her before that thread started. We have a mutual friend. The friend shared my post on Facebook, and her husband actually happened to see it and click on it with no intention of anything beyond reading a story. But, reading the story became entering in. And, he shared it with his wife who also entered in and found herself thinking about him long after she walked away from the screen. Reading the story led to late night conversations as a couple and lots and lots of prayer. Then, somehow, the thread that was full of questions took a turn.

The joy in my heart is making me want to burst and the effort to restrain my heart from just taking off is enormous! I want to follow the right steps. I just got a message from my husband. “I’m amused at the Lord.” “Sweet, sweet, boy”.

She had already been feeling that tug of yes. And, her husband sensed that tug too…even before she did.

I can’t tell you much more than that, friends. But, this I can say: Somewhere in China right now on someone’s desk in some office is a file folder with paperwork about and old pictures of this sweet, sweet boy stamped in red ink with the word MATCHED…however that is said in Chinese.

LCG waving

I can’t wait to see him in October and tell him that he’s got a family that’s way more than “ordinary” who is already working very hard to bring him home as fast as they possibly can.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: Advocating, Orphans, The Sparrow Fund

#TC2016 {Mark your calendars now}

8.14.15

I’m not going to try to put into words why you need to come to Together Called 2016, at least not today. Instead, I’m just going to share a few quotes from couples who were there last year. I think they make my point way better than I can.

There simply are no words. We haven’t brought our daughter home yet, so we didn’t even know if we belonged at this retreat. We could not have been more blessed….God reaffirmed our calling and reassured us in so many ways this weekend….We also received great insight into our marriage and our bio kids just by having this time away that was centered upon family. God has mightily worked through you by you following his calling to put on this retreat. You blessed our socks off, and we could never thank you enough.

We gained a perspective from others, hearing what they have walked through, that gave us great encouragement as we look at our pending adoption. The stories of hope we heard as we connected with other couples were the biggest takeaway.

The retreat was so wonderful start to finish. As simple as it might sound, the care package with the note as soon as we entered our room put many of our concerns to rest immediately. We truly felt welcomed.”

It was the first time in a long time that we got to really talk and have direction in our discussion!

We came into this weekend so dry and distant and really struggling. After about 14 months or so of what we’ve deemed “crisis living,” we really needed this time away. It did not disappoint. We feel infused with support, truth, and a renewed sense of purpose for our marriage and our family.

Put TWO events on your calendar right now:

  • October 4th. Registration will open at 9pm EST on Sunday, October 4th for Together Called 2016, the fourth annual faith-based marriage retreat specifically for foster and adoptive as well as preadoptive couples. If this year is anything like previous years, it will fill up fast (and by fast, I mean minutes). Be ready to register right at 9pm to make sure you get one of those spots.
  • April 8th-10th. Those are the dates for the marriage retreat itself. It will be at a new location this year called Liberty Mountain Resort which is close to Gettysburg, PA and accessible from Dulles Airport, Baltimore Washington International Airport, or Philadelphia Airport so all you faraway peeps will have no problem getting there. In fact, you may want to arrange the grandparents or friends from church or Auntie who spoils your kids to come early and stay late so that you can head out there on Thursday and stay through Monday, to take advantage of all the cool stuff in Gettysburg.

Can’t wait to share more deets with you all as things get finalized. Until now, you’ll have to settle for dates. But, know that we have some good things in the works for whoever it is who God’s bringing out this year.

TC2016 Save the Date

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: The Sparrow Fund

the big brother {advocating}

8.14.15

We were getting into the van to leave the orphanage for the day when the director gently touched my arm and said something to our translator.

He wants to know if he can show you one more child to find a family for.

He brought me to a tall boy who was waiting for me on the front steps, fiddling with his fingers obviously nervous but also impressively willing to look me right in the eye. He continued to stand before me, nodding his head occasionally as the director spoke about him to me with the translator next to us relaying every word.

He goes to a school nearby and is very smart. He’s very social. He likes computers and running.

I saw an opportunity and jumped in.

Running? Wow. Are you fast?

Bigger smile and a head nod as he answers.

He says he’s good and wins races.

I offered him a high 5, and he accepted. The director went on.

The only thing wrong with him is that he looks weird. His brain is all normal.

I was stunned.

His eyes looked away from me as I blinked more than I should have in nervousness.

I wrote down notes in the green binder I carried with me everywhere.

school. smart. very social. computer. running….only his eyes.

That’s his reality. He’s known as the boy who looks weird. But, by some supernatural gift of grace, he’s still able to smile with his crooked teeth and unusual features and look me right in the eye.

On the last day our team was at the orphanage, the staff allowed us to take all the children who were able outside for free play. We blew bubbles and used sidewalk chalk and bounced balls and raced plasma cars. We were nearly finished when I saw L. C.G. in his school uniform running to join us. He looked right at me as he had done before with a big smile but then walked right past me. I saw his head turning, clearly looking for someone. I thought he might be looking for an ayi, maybe looking for the other boys his age whose disabilities keep them from going out to school as he gets to do. Suddenly, he stopped turning as he found what he was looking for.

for advocating post - 1

L. C.G. scooped up a child, a little one who clearly knew him as evidenced by how tightly he wrapped his poofy little arms around his neck. There in the courtyard of a place known for broken relationships, I witnessed brokenness being redeemed.

for advocating post 2 - 1

Before all else, the boy who “looks weird” was searching for this little boy. He hugged him and spoke to him as I stood marveling at how he knew he could offer this child something no one else in that place could.

After a few minutes, he put him down and brought him to an ayi and then ran off to join his buddies racing around the yard on bikes way too small for their growing bodies but not unlike my own sons would do at home.

I added more notes to my binder that night.

Gentle. Compassionate. Would make a great big brother. Look for his file. This boy needs a family.

_____________________________________

His file has been found. He’s on the shared list right now which means any agency can show families his file. And, any family—no matter where they are in their adoption process—can hold and lock his file to move forward to make him their son. Feel free to email me at kraudenbush@sparrow-fund.org if you have questions about him or the adoption process or about an agency to help you. And, click HERE to read the letter he wrote only days ago for me to share with all of you.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: Advocating, China, Orphans, The Sparrow Fund

Goodbye, Ben & Abbey {a letter to two of our best friends as they move}

8.14.15

Ben AbbeyIt probably feels like the last month has just been a string of ongoing goodbyes. We knew our turn was coming; we just tried to think about it and talk about it like it was still a far way off. But, now I’m sitting here trying to put some words together to give to you tonight. It’s our turn to say goodbye.

I’m seeing a pattern in my life lately. God supplies just I need before I even know I need it. I remember when we first met. We sat and talked about adoption and ministry while Lydia toddled around us. I thought God was using me to help give you some ideas and encourage you to step out and do whatever it was God was calling you to do.

It’s been years since that day. Since then, you’ve become family. You have filled gaps we felt and those we didn’t even know were there. You have taken things off our plates so that God could put other things on them. You have cared about our kids as people, uniquely made who God will use right now and as they grow. And, you have cared for us, giving us ideas and encouraging us to step out and do what it was God called us to do.

It’s your turn now to step out in faith. It’s your turn to go into the unknown and walk a path you’ve never been down before. And, as you do, we’re prepared to put aside the sad we feel at the gaps that you’re leaving here and be your biggest cheerleaders. There is no doubt in our minds that God has called you to this new adventure at this exact time. But, if you ever doubt it, we’re prepared to remind you. If you’re finished unpacking boxes and it doesn’t feel like home, call us and we can tell you all the funny things Lydia said that day and what Drew made last out of Legos. We’ll tell you what we’re reading and what we’re learning and tell you what is currently stressing us out. You’ll feel right at home again.

I got these pictures in my email inbox this week. They came to me and were addressed to me, but I think they were meant for you. That photography workshop we did with those children at the orphanage last fall? You ran with that, and the two of you shined so bright there. Your hearts were obviously so full and overflowing. I knew I had been a part of something incredible when I tried to hold my phone still through tears to capture on video when you gave each child the certificates and 4×6 copies of the beauty they created. You served hard there and then came home, holding those images like batons and doing your best to pass them on and keep the significance of that week going now on the side of the world where we live. And, you did that well. But, this week, when these images arrived with some simple, broken English words, I knew that God has used your efforts in such bigger ways.

photo  (2)

photo  (1)

photo  (3)

photo  (4)

Seeing how the children had responded to your workshop, the staff at the orphanage created a photography classroom where they have had local, professional photographers come to work with the kids. You started something. God used your gifts and your hearts and He brought you to that place at just the right time and God used you to start something. We thought the workshop was incredible—but this is incredibler.

I didn’t want to just email the pictures to you. We decided to print them for you so that you could put them on your new frig or tape them up to your new wall and be reminded that no matter where you are, God is using you. He’s working in and through you in the place where He has you right then and there, and He’s using you in places where you aren’t any longer. That’s the sovereign power of our God.

Life will go on here. Church will keep meeting and growing. The girls will keep sipping coffees in the wee early morning hours every Wednesday. The kids will keep growing. Mark and I will keep looking for how He wants us to be serving. It might be hard for you to know that things are continuing without you. I want to tell you right now that the gap you are leaving is a Leaman-shaped gap, and we’re fully anticipating you coming back and wiggling right back into that spot. But, I also want to tell you that the impact you have on our lives and all the lives of those people God has put in front of you is not ceasing as you leave this place. He is going to continue to multiply how you have faithfully served us and others and ultimately Him, just like He multiplied how you served those children in China. And, when He gives us glimpses of it, we’ll be sure to tell you. That’s what cheerleaders do. And, maybe He’ll somehow use those moments to do what I wanted to do in the beginning, to encourage you to press on and continue to do whatever it is God is calling you to do.

May He bless you abundantly and fill every gap in your lives, even the ones you don’t know you have, as you start on this new adventure, trusting Him to go with you with every step.

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Posted by Kelly the Overthinker
Filed Under: Letters

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